Everybody Hates Rand: A Wheel Of Time Podcast

Discussion topics this week include My Mind Fire: The Band, Fantasy Hair Cuts, Knife Boy and Lava Girl, The REAL Kingkiller, and Chumbawamba-phobia. Transcript 

In which we struggle to pronounce Barthanes' name, long for the Betsy Ross/Ross Betsy timeline that never was, and make way too many comparisons to Supernatural.  Transcript

Hey, we got mics! We get a little sappy thanking you for your support, but we're just so excited! Please forgive all audio issues -- Emily is relearning how to record and edit with this fancy new technology. Tune in for Whitecloak Resumes, the Gay Energy in the Atmosphere, and the Nightgown Pervert. Transcript 

This episode sparked a lot of ideas for the Wheel of Time TV adaptation, including casting Thom Merrilin as Taika Watiti, Rhuarc looking into the camera like he's in the Office, and a really great flashback to that time no one would speak to Mat except his mother. Take note, Amazon. Transcript

This episode was over an hour long until Emily edited out twenty minutes of us arguing over which characters Galad could have sexual tension with. That's pretty much all you need to know.   Transcript 

Sorry for the long episode, but we just couldn't help talking about the sex and power dynamics of the Warder bond for 25 minutes. We also complained about the Heterosexual Lack of Chemistry Default and took a long look at all the fear archetypes in Nynaeve's Magic Hazing Ritual.    Transcript

The chapters we read this week were full of Lord of the Rings references, so you KNOW we had a long talk about Magic Artifacts of Doom and Aragorn's sex appeal. We also discussed Drunk Scrabble, Walk-Up Music, and Mat's Polyamorous War Cabinet.   Transcript

There's a lot of chaotic sexual energy in this episode, and for that at least one of us apologizes. We talk about the Sex Shirt, Daenerys and her Animal Sidekick, and that one unfortunate instance where Gawyn Was Right. Transcript 

This episode we're talking about the dreaded literary embodiment of hentai herself, Lanfear. We explain in detail why we hate her, but we also have some non-hentai conversations about Magic Trees, the Talent Cycle, and that TV adaptation that's in the works.  Transcript

Hey, this week we're going to alternate dimensions and talking to wolves! We're also spending a great deal of time questioning whether Rand is really Leader Material or Just Tall. (Hint: We think he's just tall and has fancy clothes. He's running a long con.) Thanks for waiting! Transcript 

All you really need to know headed into this episode is that we really, really, REALLY don't like the term "deflowered." Transcript 

It's a tired and giggly episode of EHR! We're talking about how Lan gives terrible advice, how Hurin should be spending time on his post-grad, and how Uno deserves true love, probably with someone brave and manly. And hilarious. And -- okay, it's Gaul. We've already planned the wedding. Transcript 

This week we're talking about a very important chapter: the one where the Chosen One finds out he's been Chosen. For once, we feel very bad for Rand. We discuss the narrative, symbolic, mythic, psychological, cosmic significance of this moment. And, of course, we argue that it would be even better if Perrin dabbled in pagan witchcraft.  Transcript 

This episode, in which we primarily discuss dark prophecies, question Padan Fain's reasoning, and collectively gag over The Great Hunt's weird penchant for graphic violence, we introduce two new characters to our Updated, Revised, and All-Around Better Version of WoT: Larry the Good Trolloc and Ilyeno.  Transcript

In which Rand would totally be a Soul Cycle cult leader, Elaida is Donald Trump, Moiraine's ego is an unstoppable force, Robert Jordan uses RateMyAesSedai dot com, and we humbly suggest that you Do Not Do A War Crime.  Transcript

We're joined by professional costumer and Yu-Gi-Oh! enthusiast Sarah McClintock to talk about clothes, fantasy, and denim on denim. She helps answer questions like: Why is Robert Jordan obsessed with butts and breeches? Why is the boob situation in Tel'aran'rhiod so important? What happens when you dress a farm boy like a fancy lord and give him responsibility? Transcript

Please excuse the background hum of AC in this week's episode -- it's 95 degrees in Utah! And a balmy 70 in Fal Dara when the Amyrlin Seat arrives. We talk about Tigger: Rap God, Alien v. Sexual Predator, a Flannel of Lesbians, and get this: we finally consult the pronunciation guide.  Transcript 

Hey, hey, we're kicking off season two -- and The Great Hunt -- with a ten-minute intro about our homelessness and other misfortunes. Then we talk about Acne and Assholery, Drunk Uncles and Fish Metaphors, and new game show Are You Taller Than a Cello? Transcript 

With Sally out of town, this week Emily is joined by guest co-host Cambria Hobbs, our Wheel of Time progenitor and resident astrology expert. We tackle topics like Rand's so-called sex appeal, Gawyn's Gemini-ness, and Robert Jordan's whole anti-birthday thing. Transcript

You have questions, and we have answers, on every topic imaginable, from Emily's less-than-stellar academic career to books as murder weapons to Jude Law's true place in the Wheel of Time-verse. Thanks for the questions!​ Transcript