Creating A Family: Talk About Infertility, Adoption & Foster Care

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.How do you discipline kids who have experienced trauma? We provide 5 tips and then discuss 5 challenging parenting situations. Our expert is Karen Doyle Buckwalter, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Registered Play Therapist and Supervisor, and co-author of "Raising the Challenging Child".In this episode, we cover:1.     The Relationship Bank Account Spend effort building your relationship with your child so that you have banked “good will” for when you need to say no or set a firm rule. Ideas for making quick and easy deposits:Praise efforts, successes, helpfulness, their unique essence—big and small.Let the child choose whenever possible. Look for compromises.Make more deposits than withdrawals.Magic “rule” 5 positive comments to every 1 negative.Difference between making a deposit and spoiling your child.Sideswipe instead of confront. 2.     Respond to What is Beneath the Behavior Behavior is a reflection of a need. It’s a symptom

What's it like to have your world turned upside down when you become the parent to your grandchild, niece, or nephew? What are the hidden joys and challenges. In this podcast episode, we have a frank and open talk with a panel of kinship caregivers about their experience.In this episode, we cover: What has been one of the greatest joys you’ve experienced as a kinship caregiver?What has been one of the greatest challenges you’ve had in raising your grandchild or niece or nephew?How has your age played into your parenting experience with this child?How has caring for your grandchild affects your friendships and activities?How do you handle the dual roles of being a mom to your grandchild and a mom to your grandchild’s parent? How has kinship caregiving impacted your role as parent to your child? Have you had to set boundaries with your child to protect your grandchild?How have you handle if your grandchild’s parent has another child? Would you take that child in as well?How have you learned about technolog

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.How old is too young for a phone? Is gaming harmful to our kids? How much technology is too much. We talk with Dr. Jay Berk, a licensed psychologist and an expert in working with children and families. He is the author of two books: “A Parent’s Quick Guide to Electronic Addiction” and “Codeswitching: Social Skills in the Screen-Age”.In this episode, we cover:Parents from time immemorial have worried about the impact of the “new technology” and this goes back to our great great great grandparents worrying about the influence of novels to parents of the 50’s worry about too much time on the phone, to parents of the 80s worrying about too much TV, and on to the present where we worry about screen time, texting, and gaming. We parents are digital “immigrants” while our kids are digital natives. How does this dynamic present challenges?How to keep up with what our kids are doing?What are the general best practices for elementary aged kids using digi

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.Have you ever wondered if your struggle to conceive could be caused by your genes? Today we're going to answer that question and more about genetics and fertility by talking with two certified genetic counselors with CooperGenomics: Sharyn Lincoln and Sheila Johal.In this episode, we cover:Infertility is a disease affecting nearly 7% of all couples. It is a highly heterogeneous pathology with a complex etiology that includes both environmental and genetic factors. In this episode we will be focusing on the genetics. What percentage of infertility can be attributed to our genes? Genetics and Female Infertility47,XXX (trisomy X; Triple X)⁃       What is trisomy X?⁃       How common is 47,XXX?⁃       What are the symptoms of Triple X syndrome?⁃       How common is infertility in women with Triple X?⁃       Will the children conceived also have this chromosomal abnormality?Turner syndrome (monosomy X)⁃       What is Turner Syndrome?⁃       How

Bringing foster children into your family may impact the kids already in your home—both in positive and potentially negative ways. We will provide suggestions on how to integrate new foster children into your home as seamlessly as possible. Our guest expert is Dr. Eshele Williams, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, who brings her professional expertise with counseling foster families as well as her personal experience as being a biological child in a family that fostered many children in her childhood.In this episode, we cover:Positive benefits of fostering on children already in the family.Possible challenging issues children in the family might face when foster children join the family.Benefits of preparing children in the family for the realities of fostering.This podcast is produced  by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them. Creating a Family brings you the follow

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.What do we mean by attachment and what can parents do to help their child attach. What can parents do if they are struggling with attaching to their child. We talk with Dr. Casey Call, the Assistant Director of Education at the Institute of Child Development at TCU. She is a researcher and trainer for Trust-Based Relational Intervention.In this episode, we cover:What is attachment and why is it so important to a child’s development?How does attachment develop in children who are raised from infancy in a healthy functioning family? What does healthy attachment look like?What events can interrupt the normal development of healthy attachment? (e.g. multiple caregivers, abuse, neglect) What about a primary care giver with mental illness? What about long term hospitalization?When we have a child placed in our homes for either adoption or fostering, what are some signs that this child may have attachment issues?Attachment issues fall along a spectrum

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.What do adoptive and foster parents need to know about the impacts of prenatal exposure to opioids, Suboxone, and Methadone. What are the risks to a baby born with Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome or Neonatal Opioid Withdrawal Syndrome (NOWS)? We talk with Dr. Julian Davies, a pediatrician at the University of Washington’s Center for Adoption Medicine and their FASD and Prenatal Exposure Clinic.In this episode, we cover:What are opiates or opioids? What are the most common opiates that are being used during pregnancy? What are the most common non-opiate drugs that are being used by pregnant women? What are the common treatment medication/drugs given to those struggling with addiction who are trying to get off opioids? Methadone, Suboxone, and Subutex Are Methadone, Suboxone, and Subutex safe to use during pregnancy? What are the short- and long-term impacts on infants exposed to opiates? What are the short- and long-term impacts of infants exposed

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.Have you or someone you care about experienced a miscarriage or stillbirth? We talk about coping with pregnancy loss with Dr. Poonum Sharma, a Licensed Psychologist specializing in reproductive issues. She is a long term member of the Mental Health Provider Professional Group at the American Society of Reproductive Medicine.In this episode, we cover:Miscarriage and Stillbirth StatisticsDistinction between a miscarriage and stillbirth. A stillbirth is the death of a baby before or during delivery. Both miscarriage and stillbirth describe pregnancy loss, but they differ according to when the loss occurs. In the United States, a miscarriage is usually defined as loss of a baby before the 20th week of pregnancy, and a stillbirth is loss of a baby at 20 weeks of pregnancy and later.About 1 pregnancy in 100 (1%) end in stillbirth, and each year about 24,000 babies are stillborn in the United States.For women who know they’re pregnant, about 10 to 15

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.What issues should you consider if you want to adopt as a single person? We talk with Susan Fremer, a licensed mental health intern and a single mom of five adopted girls; and Lee Varon, a LICSW specializing in adoptive parenting, a single mom to two sons through adoption, and author of two books on single parent adoption. In this episode, we cover:Single parenting is common. Are there distinctions between becoming a single parent through divorce, conception, and adoption? How easy is it to adopt as a single woman or single man? Are there any additional requirements for single parents to be able to adopt? Any additional questions in the home study?  Legal issues. Importance of a will and naming a guardian. What are some potential issues single parents should consider before they decide to adopt? Is there another single parent or family that you could partner with to provide mutual child care support either full time or babysitting type arrangem

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.Grandparents raising grandkids or aunts and uncles raising nephews and nieces is often complicated and comes with a mix of challenges and blessings. What are the unique issues that kinship caregivers face and what do they need to succeed. We talk about these issues with LaNette Jacobs, an aunt raising her two nephews; Marla Galvan, a licensed clinical social worker and Foster Care Strategic Consultant for Child Welfare Information Gateway; Dr. Ali Caliendo, the Executive Director of Foster Kinship, a nonprofit support of kinship families in Nevada; and Jaia Lent, the Deputy Executive Director at Generations United where she provides direction for the National Center on Grandfamilies.In this episode, we covered:Kinship care, also often called grandparent care or grandparent-led families, is used to care for children whose parents are unable. And while we will often use the term grandparent, we fully recognize that it is often aunts, uncles, cous

Should you consider freezing your eggs? What is involved and how much does it cost. We talk with Dr. Taraneh Nazem, Board-Certified Reproductive Endocrinologist with Reproductive Medicine Associates of NY.In this episode, we cover:Female Fertility Overview of female fertility.What impacts fecundity?How important is age in female fertility?Why does age negatively impact fertility in women?What other factors decrease a woman’s fertility?Fertility PreservationAt what age does fertility begin to decrease?What causes Diminished Ovarian Reserves?What are the symptoms of Diminished Ovarian Reserves?How to evaluate and diagnosis Diminished Ovarian Reserves?What can women do to support their fertility and maintain optimum fertility for as long as possible?Does birth control influence future fertility positively or negatively? Does exercise impact female fertility?Egg FreezingWho should consider egg freezing?At what age should women consider freezing their eggs?What is the egg freezing process?What are the short and lo

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.Have you ever wondered why a specific behavior by your child drives you crazy? What do we as parents bring to the relationship that could be part of the problem? We talk about how a parent's history with attachment and trauma impacts our parenting with Dr. Patrice Berry, a licensed clinical psychologist with specialized training in adoption and foster care and over 15 years of clinical experience. In this episode, we cover:·      Research has shown that our attachment style with our own parents is the biggest predictor of the attachment style we’ll have with our child.·      What do we mean by attachment style? Attachment style refers to the internal “working models” we develop of how relationships function. They influence the way we relate to important people in our lives. The attachments we form in our early relationships with parents or caretakers can have an impact on our feelings of insecurity, anxiety, fear, avoidance, and satisfacti

How can you talk full advantage of the Adoption Tax Credit? What changes are important when filing for this credit for your 2020 taxes. We talk with Becky Wilmoth, an Enrolled Agent and Adoption Tax Credit Specialist with Bill's Tax Service and Josh Kroll, the Adoption Subsidy Resource Center coordinator at the North American Council on Adoptable Children.In this episode, we cover: What is the Adoption Tax Credit for adoption being claimed on 2020 federal taxes $14,300It is a non-refundable tax credit. How to advocate for refundability.What is a “credit” and how does it differ from a deduction or some other form of tax savings? If you get a tax refund every year, how would you use the Adoption Tax Credit? If you don’t have any federal tax liability, should you still apply the credit to your federal income taxes? What type of adoptions are included or excluded? Stepparent adoption? Embryo adoption? Same-sex partner second parent adoption? Unmarried heterosexual second parent adoption? Surrogacy?Can you ge

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.We talk about evaluating the risk factors for foster care with Dr. Kimara Gustafson, an Assistant Professor in the Department of Pediatrics at the University of Minnesota with appointments at both their Adoption Medicine Clinic and Pediatric Emergency Department.In this episode, we cover:The common risk factor that foster parents and those wanting to adopt from foster care need to be aware of include physical, emotional, developmental, educational, and behavioral problems rooted in childhood adversity and trauma.What types of trauma are foster kids exposed to? Neglect, abuse, prenatal exposure, multiple caregivers, not having a reliable caregiver, constant stress What percentage of children in foster care have been exposed to drugs or alcohol prenatally? Impact of trauma on physical health.  Foster parents often have little information about prior health history. Overmedication of foster children and youth. Research has found that the average n

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.We don’t just bring kids into our homes; we bring them into our marriage and relationships. And marriages or relationships are particularly challenged when we are parenting kids who have been exposed to trauma. We talk with Amy Garber, MSW and LICSW, the Manager of the Post Adoption Program with Wide Horizons for Children, a child welfare organization. We also talk with Anne Meijers, a licensed clinical social worker, specializing in adult and couples therapy.In this episode, we cover:Our goal should be for our marriage or relationships to be around long after the kids leave home. This takes being proactive because if we’re not careful our relationship becomes all about parenting or fostering.How can kids enhance a marriage or relationship? We know that kids who’ve experience trauma can be challenging to parent and can test a marriage or a relationship.Why are children adopted or fostered past infancy, children with prenatal exposure, and kids

What should you expect as you return home with a newly adopted baby or child? What are the common emotions? We talk with Laura Jean Beauvais, a licensed professional counselor and mother of two adult daughters through adoption. She has conducted domestic, foster, and international adoptions for more than 25 years.In this episode, we cover:Adopting a NewbornWhat are some common emotions when adopting a newborn?What are some common stresses when adopting a newborn?How may the revocation period affect the transition to new adoptive parenting?Expectations of extended family during this transition period.How do the stresses of newly adopted families differ from a family that gives birth to their child?How does the pre-adoption process affect this transition to new parenthood?What are some feelings that come up about birth parents after the baby comes home? Realities of open adoptions Handling grief of birth family Feeling like the presence of a birth mom makes the adoptive mom less of a “real” mom The balance of p

What foods and supplements help improve fertility for those trying to conceive naturally and for those undergoing fertility treatment. We talked with Dr. Jorge E. Chavarro, Associate Professor of Nutrition and Epidemiology at the Harvard School of Public Health and Medicine at Harvard Medical School. Dr. Chavarro’s research is focused on understanding how nutrition and lifestyle impact human reproduction. He is the Principal Investigator of the Nurses’ Health Study 3 – an ongoing prospective cohort of young professional women started in 2010 designed to investigate the role of lifestyle and biologic factors on women’s health – and leads the nutritional component of the EARTH Study, an ongoing prospective cohort of couples undergoing infertility treatment at the Massachusetts General Hospital.In this episode, we cover:How Does Nutrition Impact FertilityWe know that women are born with all the eggs they are ever going to have so how does nutrition impact female fertility and egg quality?How does nutrition impac

Children adopted from foster care or from abroad have often experienced abuse, neglect, or trauma. These children require a different form of parenting.  This is a re-air of an older interview we did with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, author of The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family, and the founder and Director of the TCU Institute of Child Development, about how to help children from hard places heal.  In this episode, we cover:Why is parenting abused children different from traditional parenting?What are the 3 most important things you should do during the first 6 months home with a newly adopted child?How can we discipline our children while still remaining connected and create attachment?How can we help a child who has tantrums whenever he hears the word “no,” or is told he can’t do something?How long should parents stay home (if possible) after adoption?How can parents be proactive with children who have experienced abuse and neglect in order to help them and to improve behavio

How do you find and adopt a baby or child in another state and what is the Interstate Compact for the Placement of Children (ICPC)? We talk with Chantilly Wijayasinha, MSW and MPH and Interim Director of Adoptions and Foster Care at Vista Del Mar Child & Family Services; and Jim Thompson, adoption, foster care, and assisted reproduction attorney at the Thompson Dove Law Group, and a Fellow at Academy of Adoption & Assisted Reproduction Attorneys.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)

How is the COVID-19 pandemic impacting those people who are trying to create their family through surrogacy —both those seeking surrogates in the US and those going abroad. We talk with Dr. Barry Witt, the Medical Director of WINFertility and Greenwich Fertility.In this episode, we cover:How is surrogacy practiced in the US?What is the distinction between gestational surrogate and a traditional surrogate?Is it possible to go abroad to find a surrogate?Why do people go abroad?What are the most popular countries for people to go to for surrogacy? (including the US)How has COVID-19 impacted intended parents seeking surrogates in the US?How has COVID-19 impacted people seeking surrogates in another country, including those coming to the US?Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)